My Dad Is The Best But He Lies
Okay, unpopular opinion time. My dad is the best. Seriously, he is.
But... he also lies. A lot.
The King of Exaggeration
It's not malicious, mind you. It's more like... a *performance*. He's crafting a narrative. One where he's always the hero of the story.
Remember that time he "single-handedly" saved the neighborhood picnic from a swarm of bees? Turns out, my mom swatted away, like, two. My dad mostly yelled and ran.
The Fish Tale Phenomenon
Oh, the fishing stories! Each one is a masterpiece of embellishment. Every fish grows bigger, bolder, and braver with each retelling.
I'm pretty sure he once caught a mythical bass. It spoke to him, offered him three wishes. Okay, maybe not, but you get the point.
He swears he wrestled a shark for a tuna once. I saw the picture, it was a baby shark, like really baby. And the tuna was from the supermarket, I know it!
The "Slightly" Modified Truth
He's not above bending the truth for convenience. Especially when it comes to chores.
"Honey, I totally emptied the dishwasher." Translation: He took out three mugs. And left the rest.
He says he cleaned the garage. He just shifted everything from one side to the other. That is a clean in his book.
“The car is full of gas!” In dad language, it's enough to get to the end of the street.
The "Remember When?" Recollections
His memories are... selective. He remembers things the way he wants to remember them.
He always tells the story when he taught me to ride a bike. He omits the part where I crashed into the rose bushes and cried for an hour.
According to him, I aced every math test in school. My report cards tell a very different story. One involving lots of "needs improvement" comments.
Why We Still Love Him
Despite the fibs, the tall tales, and the selective memory, we adore him. His lies are endearing, almost part of his charm.
They're told with such enthusiasm, such joy. It's hard to stay mad. It's hard not to smile.
And honestly? Sometimes, the exaggerated version is just more fun. Let him have his legendary status.
Because at the end of the day, underneath all the little white lies, is a heart of gold. He truly cares for his family.
He's a good man. A funny man. And okay, a slightly dishonest man. But still, my best man!
So, here's to all the dads out there who bend the truth a little. We see you. We love you. And we secretly enjoy your outrageous stories. Thanks Dad!
"A father is neither an anchor to hold us back, nor a sail to take us there, but a guiding light whose love shows us the way." - Unknown (My dad probably said it, but I'm exaggerating).
