Now I'm Shaking Drinking All This Coffee

Okay, confession time. My hand is currently vibrating like a hummingbird's wings.

Yes, it's the coffee. I'm pretty sure I've unlocked a new level of caffeine dependency. It's not pretty.

I might be able to power a small city with the energy coursing through my veins. Maybe.

The Siren Song of the Bean

I'm not sure when it started. Probably around the same time I discovered deadlines. Now, coffee is less of a treat and more of a necessity.

My mornings begin with the ritual. The grinder, the smell, the promise of alertness. It's all very…theatrical.

Then comes the first cup. And the second. And sometimes, shamefully, a third.

Is This Normal?

Probably not. I've seen people function perfectly well on one cup. I envy them. Deeply.

My tolerance is apparently legendary. Or tragically high. Depends on who you ask, really.

But here's my controversial opinion: I kind of like the shakes.

Don't get me wrong. The tremors aren't ideal for surgery. Or painting. Or anything requiring fine motor skills.

But there's a certain…buzz. A feeling of being hyper-aware. Almost like a superpower.

Okay, maybe not a superpower. More like a super-annoyance to anyone trying to have a serious conversation with me.

Still, it's a small price to pay for getting through the day, right?

The Downside (and a Defense)

Of course, there are downsides. The inevitable crash. The jittery anxiety. The dry mouth of the Sahara.

And the need to pee. Constantly. My bladder has filed a formal complaint.

But let's be honest. We're all just trying to make it. To conquer the to-do list. To avoid nodding off during that Zoom meeting.

My Unpopular Opinion

So, here it is: maybe being a little shaky isn't the worst thing in the world. Perhaps it's a sign of dedication. Of commitment. Of a serious love for caffeine.

Maybe it means I'm actually getting stuff done. Or at least *feeling* like I am.

And isn't that half the battle?

Besides, think of it as a free workout. I'm burning calories just by trembling.

I'm practically an athlete. A very caffeinated, slightly unstable athlete.

The Future is Caffeinated

So, I'm not promising to quit. I'm not promising to cut back. At least not today.

I'm embracing the jitters. I'm riding the wave. I'm becoming one with the bean.

And if you see me vibrating across the street, just wave. And maybe offer me a cup. (Decaf, perhaps?).

Just kidding! Make it a double shot of espresso. I think I need it.

And if you’re also experiencing the coffee shakes? Welcome to the club, my friend. We have excellent (and plentiful) coffee.

We also have a support group. It meets every hour, on the hour. Bring your own mug. Strong coffee is served. Always!