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Portlandia Around The World In 80 Plates


Portlandia Around The World In 80 Plates

Okay, hear me out. What if...Portlandia, but everywhere?

The Quest for Artisanal Everything

Imagine a world where every city has its own Fred Armisen and Carrie Brownstein. These comedic duo explore the depths of local, organic, and ethically sourced food.

Think about that. Are you laughing or crying?

Episode 1: Berlin's Bicycle Bistro

Picture this: a restaurant in Berlin. Everything is transported by bicycle, even the chef's mustache wax. The special? Sprouted lentils harvested under a full moon.

The waiter has a PhD in fermentation. Of course he does.

Would you order the "Locally Sourced Disappointment" or just grab a currywurst?

Episode 2: Tokyo's Craft Kombucha Collective

Next stop: Tokyo. A group of kombucha brewers argue passionately about the terroir of their SCOBYs.

They debate the philosophical implications of using imported sugar versus locally foraged maple sap. Serious stuff.

You just want a can of Coke. Don't you?

Episode 3: Buenos Aires' Empanada Ethics

Buenos Aires features a food truck selling only empanadas. But these aren't just any empanadas.

They only use ethically-raised llamas and fair-trade oregano. The owner gives a lengthy lecture about the socio-political history of paprika with every purchase.

Suddenly, street food isn't so simple anymore.

The Unpopular Opinion

Here's where it gets controversial. Maybe, just maybe, Portlandia works because it's a *specific* brand of weird.

Trying to replicate it globally feels a bit...forced. Like wearing a fedora ironically when you don't actually get the joke.

Is it possible to have too much artisanal cheese?

The Joy of the Generic

Sometimes, you just want a burger from a chain restaurant. You know, the one with the questionable meat and the suspiciously perfect fries.

There's comfort in knowing exactly what you're getting. No surprises. No lectures.

It's like a culinary hug from corporate America.

Embrace the Imperfection

Portlandia shines because it exaggerates real-life tendencies. It reflects our culture. It isn't to be re-enacted around the world.

Trying to find the "most Portlandia" city feels like a pointless exercise. Each place has its own unique quirks.

Let's celebrate the awkwardness, but not force-feed it to everyone.

Final Thoughts

So, would "Portlandia Around the World" be hilarious? Probably, for a few episodes.

Would it quickly become tiresome and predictable? Also probably.

Maybe, instead, we should just appreciate Portlandia for what it is: a wonderfully strange and specific cultural artifact. And order a pizza.

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