Skyrim With Friends Like These Who To Kill

Okay, picture this: You're finally playing Skyrim. Not alone, shivering in your digital boots, but with your best buds. Sounds epic, right?

Except, sometimes those "best buds" have… opinions. Strong opinions. And those opinions involve you doing things that make your inner Dragonborn scream.

So, Who's Getting "Lost" in the Woods?

Let's talk followers. Serana? Amazing vampire waifu. Lydia? Sworn to carry your burdens, both literal and emotional.

But what about that one friend who insists you recruit the most annoying NPC in the game? The one who constantly blocks doorways or makes comments that make you twitch?

Suddenly, that Draugr Lord in Bleak Falls Barrow seems a lot less scary than another hour with...him.

Essential NPCs? More Like… Essentially Annoying

Here's the thing: Skyrim has a few characters who are marked as "essential." They can't die, no matter how hard you try.

Your friend? They love these guys. They drag you into quests involving them, knowing full well you secretly yearn to push them off the Throat of the World.

Suddenly, "accidental" friendly fire starts looking a lot less accidental. Maybe a strategically placed fire rune? Perhaps a well-aimed arrow... aimed, of course, at the bandit *behind* them.

The Quest Givers from Hell

We all know the type. The Jarl who sends you to kill the same three wolves for the tenth time. The mage who wants you to fetch ingredients from the other side of the map, despite you already having *ten thousand* of them.

Now imagine your friend is obsessed with these quests. They spend hours meticulously completing every single radiant quest. And they expect you to join them.

You start "accidentally" accepting quests from rival factions. "Oops, guess I just pledged allegiance to the Stormcloaks! My bad!"

Let's Talk About Choices (and Consequences... Maybe)

Skyrim is all about choice. Do you join the Imperials or the Stormcloaks? Side with the Dawnguard or the vampires? Become a werewolf or remain a boring, vanilla human?

Your friend, naturally, has decided on the "correct" choices. And they will not let you deviate. Any deviation is a personal attack.

Suddenly, that seemingly harmless questline becomes a battleground for your very friendship. The fate of Skyrim hangs in the balance... and so does your sanity.

The "Oops, All Stealth Archer" Scenario

Every. Single. Time. No matter what character you painstakingly create, your friend convinces you that stealth archer is the only viable build.

They wax poetic about sneaking, headshots, and the joys of never actually getting hit. Meanwhile, you're dreaming of dual-wielding axes and charging into battle like a Viking god.

But no. Stealth archer it is. Until... "Oops, I accidentally alerted the entire bandit camp! My bad! Guess we have to fight them head-on now!"

Important note: We're obviously kidding (mostly). Don't *actually* ruin your friendships over Skyrim. Unless... they really insist on stealth archer. Then, maybe.

The Solution? (Besides Divorce, of Course)

Communication is key. Talk to your friend. Explain (nicely!) that you'd rather not spend another hour fetching bear pelts for the Companions.

Suggest a compromise. Maybe you do *one* stealth archer mission, and then they have to spend *one* hour role-playing as a pacifist wood elf.

And if all else fails? Well, Skyrim has a *lot* of open space. Sometimes, a little bit of "accidental" separation is all you need to save your sanity... and your friendship.