The Most Disturbed Person On Planet Earth

Okay, let's get controversial. Who is the most disturbed person on Earth? I have a candidate. And trust me, it's probably someone you know.

It's not who you think. No, it's not that guy ranting about aliens on the corner. Or the lady who collects porcelain dolls. Though, no judgement.

My Unpopular Opinion

Here's my hot take: it's the person who *never* experiences buffering. Ever. Think about it.

I know, I know. Sounds crazy. But hear me out. Are they even human?

Do they live in some super-secret underground lair with direct fiber optic cables to the internet's core? Is their soul powered by 5G?

The Evidence

We all know the pain. The spinning wheel of doom. The pixelated face of your boss during that important meeting.

It's a universal experience! It unites us in shared frustration. But *this* person…escapes it all.

Are they immune to technical difficulties? Is it possible? Do they wield some sort of dark magic?

Think about the implications. They're not just living a better life. They're living a *different* one. Untethered from the digital struggle.

They probably haven't screamed at their router in years. They might not even *own* a router.

"Buffering... it's a shared human experience. Except for *that* person."

That's weird, right? More than a little unsettling.

Possible Disturbances

What else are they hiding? What other mundane annoyances do they simply bypass?

Do they never get stuck behind slow walkers? Do their socks always match? Do they *always* find a parking spot?

It raises serious questions. Are they even from this planet? Are they a glitch in the matrix?

Maybe their lack of buffering is a symptom of something far more sinister. A lack of empathy? A cold, calculating mind?

Perhaps they’re so disconnected from everyday struggle that they've lost touch with reality. Lost touch with the beauty of suffering.

Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating. A little. But think about it!

A Call to Action (Sort Of)

Next time you meet someone who brags about their perfect internet connection, look closer. Observe their behavior.

Do they laugh at your buffering woes? Do they offer solutions that involve terms like "quantum entanglement"?

If so, back away slowly. They're probably already too far gone.

Or maybe, just maybe, they're just incredibly lucky. But where's the fun in that?

Embrace the buffering! It's part of what makes us human. Let's leave the flawless internet to the robots and the truly, deeply, disturbed.

So, next time your video freezes, remember this: you're not alone. And somewhere out there, someone is always buffering-free... and that's the *real* horror.