You And Me And Tennessee Every Other Holiday

Okay, let's be honest. Holidays. They're supposed to be magical. But sometimes, they’re just…complicated.

Especially when family and travel get thrown into the mix.

The Holiday Shuffle

Picture this: Thanksgiving at your place. Christmas at your partner's parents. New Year's Eve? Some obligatory party.

Sounds familiar, right? Now, throw in a few state lines.

Specifically, Tennessee. Why Tennessee? Because everyone seems to have a connection to it.

Maybe Grandma lives there. Maybe your cousin opened a honky-tonk. It doesn't matter. Tennessee becomes the holiday vortex.

The Every-Other-Holiday Rule

I propose a solution. A radical one, perhaps. Hear me out: Every Other Holiday in Tennessee.

That’s it. Simple. Elegant. (Relatively) Fair.

It's the only way to keep my sanity during the festive season.

Think of it as a holiday rotation strategy.

One year, it's all cornbread and country music. The next? Your own darn couch and a movie marathon.

Pros & (Potential) Cons

Okay, pros first. Less travel anxiety. More time to actually enjoy the holidays. A legitimate excuse to avoid Aunt Mildred's fruitcake.

Sounds good, right? Now, the potential cons. Some family members might disagree.

There might be tears. There might be passive-aggressive Facebook posts.

But honestly, is that any different from a regular holiday?

Navigating the Negotiation

So, how do you propose this revolutionary plan? Gently. Very gently.

Start by emphasizing the “fairness” aspect. Point out that *everyone* gets a break.

Use phrases like, "To ensure quality time" and "For the sake of family harmony". These are foolproof.

Bribery might be involved. A nice bottle of Tennessee whiskey could smooth things over.

Tennessee's Allure (and My Weariness)

Look, I get it. Tennessee is great. The music. The barbecue. The rolling hills.

But sometimes, you just need a holiday season that doesn’t involve a five-hour car ride and explaining why you don't line dance.

Plus, imagine the possibilities! You could start your own traditions. Learn to knit. Finally finish that book.

Or just sleep. Glorious, uninterrupted sleep.

The Verdict

So, am I advocating for a complete boycott of holiday travel to Tennessee?

Of course not. Just suggesting a more…measured approach. An "every other" strategy.

Think of it as self-preservation. A little bit of sanity in a world gone candy-cane crazy.

Who’s with me? Let's reclaim our holidays, one year at a time.

And maybe, just maybe, that fruitcake will finally disappear.

Disclaimer: Side effects of the "Every Other Holiday" rule may include increased happiness, reduced stress levels, and the ability to actually remember what happened during the holidays. Consult your family before implementing.