I Want To Be A Wall Volume 3
Okay, let's be honest. Who else secretly wants to be a wall sometimes?
No, seriously. Hear me out. It's not as crazy as it sounds.
The Appeal of Immovability
Think about it. Walls are always there. Unwavering. Silent.
They don't have to deal with traffic. No awkward small talk. Just pure, unadulterated... existence.
Is it just me, or does that sound incredibly appealing on a Monday morning?
Volume 3: Wall Wisdom
We're back, people! "I Want to Be a Wall" volume three is here.
Let’s explore more perks of the wall-life. Remember, this is all very hypothetical (mostly).
Because, like, who *actually* wants to be a wall? (Raises hand slightly).
The Ultimate Listener
Walls hear everything. Whispered secrets, late-night arguments, epic movie nights.
They're the ultimate confidants. And they never, ever judge.
Try getting that kind of loyalty from your best friend. Good luck!
No More Fashion Dilemmas
Ever spent an hour agonizing over what to wear? Walls don’t have that problem.
Their outfit? A fresh coat of paint (maybe). Utter simplicity.
Think of all the time saved! Time you could spend... staring blankly at something. Very wall-like.
Things Walls Don’t Have to Worry About
Let's list some of the amazing perks. No taxes! No diets! No dating app profiles!
Walls are free from the tyranny of notifications. Bliss.
Seriously, imagine a life without the incessant *ding* of your phone. A wall's life.
The Art of Observation
Walls witness history unfold. They see families grow, trends come and go, furniture rearranged countless times.
They’re silent observers of the human drama. A front-row seat to the greatest show on Earth.
Without having to pay for tickets. Beat that, Broadway!
But Wait, There’s More! (Of Nothing)
Walls excel at doing absolutely nothing. And they’re applauded for it!
No pressure to be productive. No need to achieve anything. Just... be.
It's the ultimate act of rebellion against the modern obsession with productivity. Take notes, people!
The Downside? (Maybe)
Okay, okay, there are potential drawbacks. Limited social interaction, for one.
And the occasional aggressive game of indoor soccer. Ouch.
But hey, nobody's perfect. Not even walls.
So, Are You Ready to Embrace Your Inner Wall?
Of course not! This is all a bit of fun. But consider the wall next time you feel overwhelmed.
A symbol of strength and silent resilience.
Maybe just stand a little straighter. Breathe a little deeper. Channel your inner wall.
And remember: Sometimes, doing nothing is exactly what you need. Embrace the stillness.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go stand in a corner for a while.
Just...thinking. About walls.
The"I Want to Be a Wall" series is purely for entertainment purposes. Please do not attempt to actually become a wall. Consult a therapist if you genuinely feel like becoming an inanimate object.
